Minnesota at New Orleans

I just can’t see Brett Favre winning this for Minnesota. I’d pick New Orleans’ defense stopping Minnesota’s offense in what could be a shoot-out. Favre is missing that receiver I can’t think of at the moment and Percy Harvin is having migraines. And migraines ain’t no joke. How can you run routes when your head is being destroyed? Favre’s nightmare is revisited on Thursday. New Orleans.

Miami at Buffalo

How many games will Buffalo win this year? And how many games will Miami win before we really start to care? I really don’t see Buffalo as the type of team that gets off to a good start I’m going with Miami.

Detroit at Chicago

I feel bad for the Lions. But not bad enough to pick them over the Bears. I say the Bears win this one mainly because I can’t pick the Lions until the Lions start proving they can actually win a game. I can’t pick the Lions this early until I see them in action. Chicago.

Oakland at Tennessee

Anyone who knows me knows that I always try to find a reason to not pick the Titans. This game doesn’t look good for Oakland. Their at Tennessee and they have to play Chris Johnson. We all know Oakland’s run defense is suspect. And yeah the offense will be better with Jason Campbell…it will be better nobody said anything about it being good. Also, I don’t see the hype about Oakland stealing the division. Tennessee.

Cincinnati at New England

I have a feeling this is going to be a really good game. The Cardiac Cats are going to be in effect this game. I think the Bengals can beat the Pats here but the Pats make less mistakes than the Bengals. I’m going to say this will be close but it’s hard to pick the Bengals to not only beat the Pats but not beat themselves. I’m doing it any way though. Cincinnati upset.

Carolina at NYG

This is strange because I feel a lot of people are high on Carolina and downing the Giants. Personally I think Carolina is a year away from being really good. Only time will tell. For now I’m going with the Giants.

Atlanta at Pittsburgh

I’m going with the Steelers here because I like the Steelers D. I like the Steelers at home. I like the Steelers passing attack against Atlanta’s pass defense (yes even with out Big Ben). I might even go so far as to say people will love Dennis Dixon after this game. I think Matt Ryan & Co. is going to struggle against the Steelers D and Mike Tomlin is going to have a great game plan for success with Dixon at QB. Pittsburgh.

Cleveland at Tampa Bay

This is one of those games that I wonder if anyone will win. On paper I had trouble really picking a winner so I’m going with coaching and management on this pick early in the season. Holmgren/Mangini seems better I’m going with Cleveland.

Denver at Jacksonville

I predict Jacksonville will have more people on the field than people in the stands. I really think Jacksonville will have a stellar offensive year.  I say Jacksonville wins it but the people of Jacksonville won’t care. They’ll still walk away angry because Tebow didn’t play.

Indianapolis at Houston

If you followed my picks last year you know I rarely pick against Houston. Visions of last year play through my head though. An unprepared Houston team looks horrible in the season opener. We all know the Colts are robots, emotionless beings on this earth for the shear purpose of playing playoff football. As much as I want to pick the Texans I see the first half of this game being Houston shaking the rust off while the Colts show that they are a well oiled machine. The second half will tease me and make me think we could come back but the Colts always find ways to beat the Texans. Prove me wrong Kubiak, Colts win.

San Francisco at Seattle

Everyone, myself included, is on the 49ers bandwagon this preseason. I think the 49ers defense is going to be great. And the reports of the crazy drills they’re putting Alex Smith through makes me think the offense is going to be bland but will be able to move the ball. I think rookie coach Pete Carroll might look a little bad in this game. Who is Matt Hasselbeck going to be throwing to again? Wait is Hasselbeck even starting anymore? Maybe I just don’t know anything about the Seahawks…anyway I choose San Fran.

Green Bay at Philadelphia

Aaron Rodgers is going to prove he’s worth the hype and my  good old friend Dom Campers has a solid defense in Green Bay. Meanwhile in Philly, they’re making adjustments. I think Green Bay is too strong of an opponent for Philly here. I hope Kolb has a good game because I really like him and it could get nasty for him if he doesn’t produce and win. I hope to see a lot of Kevin Kolb Cambell’s Chunky Soup commercials in this game…McNabb passed that torch to Kolb too right? Green Bay.

Arizona at St. Louis

This game seems a lot more exciting on paper than it actually is…and it really doesn’t excite me on paper. I don’t see St. Louis being capable of surprising the downward spiraling Cardinals. Arizona will win but it won’t feel like a win.

Dallas at Washington

I really want Washington to win this one. And I really want Dallas to lose every game they ever play. Ever.  But all of that aside I have to be cautious here and pick Dallas. I really need to see this Washington offense before I can feel good about picking them against good defenses.

Baltimore at NYJ

I’m still waiting for the Jets to break down. I really like this game because it’s going to be a great defensive game. The punters might actually have more to do with who wins than the quarterbacks. I like Flacco in this game more than Sanchez. I’m going with Flacco being able to put it together better than Sanchez can. Baltimore.

San Diego at Kansas City

Kansas City can be one of those surprise teams this year but ANY team in the West (NFC or AFC) could be a surprise team. I think KC could have a good season and everyone is predicting San Diego will decline this year but they’re still the better team. I’m going with San Diego, this is still a team with Philip Rivers and Norv Turner that should get them this win. But now that I think about it, Who choose this to be the opening game for Monday Night Football. San Diego at KC really? Weak.

I’m just throwing this out there so take it however you want to: “The Sports Guy” Bill Simmons went 133-116-5 this year. I love “The Sports Guy” so this isn’t a crack on him, but Bill step it up next season.

It was a great season friends. I had fun. You had fun. It was a good time. Let’s enjoy the playoffs. I’ll see you later, I’m off to change my last name to UnoSeisTres-NueveUno.

As for playoffs, we in Houston can but dream. But the AFC wildcard chase is more crowded than an elevator holding the Patriots offensive line. This might be the best last week of the season in a while. I can’t wait to watch some hardcore, heartfelt football on Sunday.

For those people hoping Belichick will play a soft game against the Texans on Sunday can keep dreaming. There’s no way Mean Ol’ Belichick is going to let another playoff contender just waltz their way to a win. Maybe he might rest the starters if they’re ahead but probably in the fourth quarter. People claim he did it in Miami a couple years back but Miami wasn’t going to the playoffs and Nick Saban is part of the Belichick mafia. Gary Kubiak won’t be so lucky. Kubiak is going to have to outwit the Pats. He’s going to have to play aggressive. He’s going to have to prove that he’s the coach that can lead this team into the playoffs. This is the defining moment of Kubiak’s coaching career in Houston. Houston fans will remember this game win or lose. If he losses, he might be back next season as head coach but no one will respect him and the whole season would be just waiting for him to mess up to kick him out of town. If he wins, he lives to see another day and he might be a hero if we sneak into that last wildcard spot.

Indy over Buffalo.

New Orleans over Carolina.

Cleveland over Jacksonville.

Houston over New England.

Minnesota over Giants.

San Fran over St. Louis.

Atlanta over Tampa Bay.

Pittsburgh over Miami.

Chicago over Detroit.

Philly over Dallas.

Kansas City over Denver.

Baltimore over Oakland.

Tennessee over Seattle.

San Diego over Washington.

Green Bay over Arizona.

Cincinnati over Jets.

Chargers over Titans.

Bengals over Chiefs.

Falcons over Bills.

The Pack over Seahawks.

Texans over Dolphins not because we need it, because I believe it.

Steelers over Ravens.

Giants over Panthers.

Pats over Jags.

Browns over Raiders.

Saints take frustration out on Bucs.

Cardinals over Rams.

‘Niners over Lions.

Eagles over Broncos.

Colts over Jets.

Cowboys over Redskins.

Vikings over Bears.

Indy over Jacksonville

New Orleans over Dallas

Cleveland over KC

Houston over St. Louis

New England over Buffalo

Miami over Tennessee

Philly over San Fran

Arizona over Detroit

Baltimore over Chicago

Atlanta over Jets

Denver over Oakland

San Diego over Cincy

Seattle over Tampa

Pittsburgh over Green Bay

Minnesota over Carolina

Giants over Washington

This week I went 10-6. Which makes me 112-63, 64 % on the season.

The Texans proved they aren’t ready for playoffs yet, which saddened my heart greatly. I’m seriously in a football depression and I’m ready to get rid of Kubiak. At least the Cougars wiped the floor with Rice…

I blame this wacky week on evil forces. Tampa brought back the orange julius jerseys, started a rookie and found a way to win. If that doesn’t tell you foul play was involved I don’t know what will.

This one is going to be interesting. Just from preconceived notions one might think that Baltimore has the stronger defense of the two. So far this season Denver has had a stingier defense. While the Broncos are off to a great season and look better on paper, I think the Ravens will win this one. The Ravens offense is pretty potent and I think this is the toughest challenge Denver has faced this season.

Houston over Buffalo

This game is a must win for Houston. If the Texans lose this game it will prove that they are not ready to be a playoff contender. Right now the Texans are on fire and the Bills have been a fringe team. If the Texans can keep their fire from the last couple of weeks they will win, if they don’t they’ll be the same Texans we saw last year…

Cleveland looses to Chicago

I thought about picking the Browns because  that would be shocking and I’m not sold on Chicago winning this game…but these are the Browns.

Dallas should beat Seattle

The thing is they should. Dallas had a great game last week against Atlanta. Their offense looked good and their defense seemed solid. But these are two flaky teams and it might be the battle of whoever makes less mistakes wins.

Miami over the Jets

The Dolphins almost beat the Saints last week. They completely fell apart but the fact remains that the Dolphins can be spectacular. The Jets are still finding their way. I would be surprised if Mark Sanchez has another bad game and Miami has a stellar offensive game. This game will most likely be close and is a must win for the Jets, but I’m just not too sure about the Jets being for real.

Indy beats San Fran

I want San Francisco to win so badly. If my Texans are to make anything of this season, Indy needs to chill out sooner or later. But the Colts are amazing. Unless Alex Smith can match Peyton Manning the ‘Niners are done for. Who would you pick first if you were playing flag football Smith or Manning?

Giants over Philly

The Eagles need a win but I think the Giants will be too much for them. The Giants can light up the board offensively and their defense is no joke. While the Eagles look like their still trying to get into a good flow.

St. Louis falls behind Detroit

Let’s just call this the most uninteresting game of football ever played. Ok, it isn’t that bad, but it’s like watching a WNBA game. Alright, I’m sorry ladies. This game should be won by Detroit because they have a little more talent. I think the most important thing to come out of this game will be the fact that the Lions will prove they are not the worst team in the NFL anymore. Now their around second or third worst. Movin’ on up.

Oakland loses to San Diego

The last time these teams met we wondered if Oakland was a serious team. Now we no longer wonder, we know that their bad. San Diego seems to be getting their act together and should win this one easily.

The Titans beat the Jags

The Titans should beat the Jags. They have home field advantage and are angry. This should be a good game. I think the Titans finally win and Vince Young will get too much credit for it.

Minnesota losses to Green Bay

That’s right. Listen to this: on paper Green Bay has a better offense in yards per game and a better defense in yards allowed per game. Green Bay’s defense has been looking tougher and they do not want to lose to Favre at home. I’m going with Green Bay in this over-publicized game.

Arizona over Carolina

The Cards are back on the rise and Carolina is struggling to just keep their heads above water. This should be a simple win for Arizona.

The Saints beat the Falcons

The Saints are amazing this year. The Falcons are a contender but I just can’t see them beating the Saints, especially after losses to the Cowboys. Saints remain undefeated.

Cincy beats Houston

It’s tough to go against my Texans especially this week. I think that this game could go either way. Two inconsistent talented teams going at each other. I personally think this game is won or lost on the line of scrimmage. Can the Texans stop the run consistently? Can the Texans run consistently? The Cardiac Cats aren’t winning any awards for consistent play themselves. Who ever is able to not turn the ball over and stop the run wins the game. But since the Bengals have more talent and play at home I give them the edge…which means the Texans will probably win.

Green Bay over Detroit

Green Bay is coming off of a bye week and are hungry for a win. Detroit is probably going to start Stafford and Calvin Johnson who are not going to be 100 %. Green Bay gets the win.

Jags over Rams

The Jaguars are not the best team but the Rams might be the worst. The Rams have been averaging 6.8 points a game while giving up 29.2 points a game. I’m no Bill Simmons but this game might be the one to bet on…

Ravens take down the Vikings

The Ravens lost a heartbreaker last week and I think will have a little fire in them. The Vikings have been playing really well and this will be a tough game but I think the Ravens potent passing will do well against the Vikings. I also think Brett Favre will get knocked down a bit, the Ravens have 11 sacks so far this season. But the ol’ Gunslinger might scrape by. It’ll be a good game.

Saints beat the Giants

This is going to be another good game. The most important thing here is the running game for the Giants. Eli’s health is questionable and the Saints run defense is stingy. The Saints defense in general is amazing. They are talented and are capable or running the 3-4 and the 4-3. So if the Giants want to win this game Bradshaw and Jacobs (who have 730 rushing yards combined) need to make their presence known. This game might be the NFC Championship game later down the line, it’s a shame someone has to lose this game because both of these teams are great.  I’m going with the Saints mainly because Eli might not be all too healthy and those of us in Houston knows what happens if David Carr has to play.

Pittsburgh wins over Cleveland

Cleveland beat the Bills last week and they should savor the memory because that might be their only win for a while. I feel for any Browns fans out there. Troy Polamalu and his hair commercials are back and Pittsburgh will return to the top of their division…or at least second. Pittsburgh wins this. By the way here’s a little stat: Derek Anderson won last week going 2-17…yikes.

Carolina over Tampa Bay

I tried somehow to justify picking Tampa Bay but I just can’t see them winning. These teams seem to evenly matched but I think Carolina’s defense has an edge over the struggling Tampa offense.

Washington over KC

Maybe I can persuade the commissioner that both of these teams should lose and the loser of the Giants and Saints game should get the win from this match up. Washington has a defense to stop the Chief’s. However don’t count out the fact that Washington will find a way to lose.

Philly beats Oakland

Anyone will tell you Oakland’s offense is horrible. And the Eagles will make it look even worse. Shane Lechler might be on the field more than JaMarcus Russell.

The Seahawks win against the Cardinals

Matt Hasselbeck is back and Seattle should put some points on the board. This one should be a shoot-out and I’m going with the Seahawks.

New England keeps the Titans winless

This game used to be a good match up now I don’t know if I even want to watch it. Although I am interested in Junior “Senior” Seau put the hurt on Kerry Collins. New England wants to win and is the better team while the Titans are lacking confidence and an edge. I might want to watch the game just to see the Titans going 0-6.

The Bills lose to the Jets

The Bills were horrible last week, just nasty. The Jets still are a good team and the Bills might go without a touchdown again. I think that T. O. will give a good post-game pouty rant. That’s my prediction.

Bears over Falcons

These Falcons are the real deal but the Bears are no laughing matter either. The Bears are better rested and the Falcons defense might give them more points that Matt Ryan and Co. can keep up with.

Broncos remain undefeated against Chargers on Monday night

This will be a great game but I’m thinking the Chargers defense will start to give up too many yards and the Broncos will have some sort of crazy catch off of a ref’s head or something that will put them over the top and Josh McDaniels will go cray-cray. As long as the Broncos stay away from those throw back jerseys, this team demands respect.

That’s it. Here’s to a better week than last!