I recently caught up with the co-creators of The Darewolves and they agreed to do an impromptu interview with me. The following is for your reading pleasure.

Paul Salazar Jr: I’m here in a room with Timothy Wood and Marty Nichols, the co-creators of The Darewolves, a brand spanking new sketch comedy troupe. You guys have created quite a stir already in the Houston Indie Comedy world. Both of my readers have numerous questions for you. Firstly, we are all dying to know: is this related to the DARE, anti-drug, program in schools?

Marty Nichols: Actually that’s Brian Nichols. Not Marty. And no, no relation to DARE. DARE has a very different worldview than Timmy and I do.

PSJ: Brian Nichols?! Wow, I thought you were dead.

Brian Nichols: Sorry to disappoint.

Timmy Wood: Oh my god…are we starting? I’m sorry I have had my headphones on this whole time. I am listening to the latest Dean Koontz Audiobook.

BN: Liar. You’re listening to Katy Perry, I can hear it from here.

TW: She is the narrator. Get your facts straight before you start to hate!

PSJ: Either way, it explains why his ears are bleeding. So gents, what is a Darewolf?

TW: Well The Darewolves are sketch troupe full comedians and writers that are from Houston, Texas and We are doing a show at Midtown Arts Center on August 20th.

PSJ: I know what The Darewolves are, let me rephrase; what is a darewolf?

TW: What is a darewolf? Its a word we made up because it sounds like werewolf.

PSJ: (Yawns.)

TW: It’s a werewolf on a motorcycle how about that for an answer.

PSJ: Don’t get testy. I ask the hard hitting questions that the people want to know. I come at you like an orangutan! Every which way but loose!

TW: Fine, we will answer them Any Which Way We Can.

BN: Right Turn, Clyde. Get it? Any Which Way We Can? Clint Eastwood? Whatever.

PSJ: Hmmm. That leads me to my next question. Why comedy?

TW: Paul, come on be real for a moment. Where did you go to journalism school anyway?

PSJ: Journalism school? There is no such thing, you don’t have to go to school to ask hard hitting questions. Don’t worry about it. What is comedy?

TW: I’ll let Brian take this one.

BN: Comedy is silly business that makes you giggle. Back to you, Paul, you told us this interview would be appearing in a nationwide publication. Can you give me a name?

TW: Yeah Paul, you are asking us some vague questions. If I were you I would be asking stuff like “Hey when did y’all get the idea to do this show?’ ‘Why Houston?’ ‘What are your influences?’ What should the audience expect?’ In fact I am going to ask those questions to Brian. That’s right Paul. I am hijacking this interview.

PSJ: Fine then, I didn’t want to talk to you in the first place. I’ll take the first question Brian, I got the idea to do this show when I became a spirit and embodied Brian Nichols. I had the idea that Houston needs a new sketch comedy show and I called Timmy immediately. He loved it and he loved me. A match made in heaven.

TW: Eh that’s actually pretty accurate except it didn’t involve Paul’s spirit at all. Basically, Brian and I love Houston and love the comedy training and friendships that we made there. We wanted to do a show with all of those people before they skipped down. Which happens in Houston a lot. We decided to film it so we could have a nice body of work that all us comedians could be proud of.

PSJ: Don’t underestimate my spirit travel. I’ll spirit you right now, Timmy! (Sighs.) But I forgive you. So your filming this? I don’t have that in any of my notes. When were you guys going to tell me this was being filmed?

BN: Not until after you signed your release. Can we get that back, by the way?

PSJ: My legal team is reviewing it…when were you guys ever planning on telling me anything? I don’t even know when the show is.

BN: What? It’s Friday, August 20th at the Midtown Art Center. Timmy just said that! Paul, is that a bottle of cough syrup in your pocket?

PSJ: No, that’s a shamrock shake, but there is whiskey in there. You want a taste?

BN: That’s disgusting. So Timmy, in what ways would you say that Darewolves differs from your past comedy endeavors?

TW: That is such a great question, Brian. Really good question. Well, most of the other projects have been a little sketch show here or an improv show there. And I know its kind of been the same for you Brian. This is an amalgamation of all our projects in one big final show. Something like that. Brian, I am going to turn the same question on you now.

BN: Great question, Tim, thanks for asking. Well, the most obvious aspect of Darewolves which is new for me is the fact that it is being professionally filmed. Everybody in the group has extensive experience with live theatre, and specifically live comedy, but for a lot of us, film is a new thing. And even though I’ve worked with most of the cast of Darewolves before, I’ve never had the opportunity to do a project with all of these guys and gals at the same time, and a lot of them have never worked with each other before. So Darewolves is essentially our attempt to get a group of the funniest people we know on stage together, and try to capture that magic live on tape. In a lot of ways, it’s the most ambitious project I’ve ever been a part of. Paul? Paul? Should we just let him sleep?

TW: Wait, (checks Paul’s pulse) yeah he’s fine. Tell me more about your influences and what style of comedy you are trying to deliver with this show.

PSJ: I’m not sleeping my eyes are just closed. You’re questions are boring as peppermints! Here’s a real good question, are ghosts real? And if they are do you think they would wear clothes?

TW: Oh now he’s awake. I don’t know. How come Patrick Swayze can’t touch anyone in Ghost but he can stand on subway platforms and stairs? How come he doesn’t sink beneath the earths surface? That is a good question. But not a great one. It’s not great because we all know Ghosts aren’t real.

PSJ: Mmm-hmm. Yes. I interview. Brian, your thoughts?

TW: “I interview?” What are you Tarzan? Frankenstein? Joe Biden?

PSJ: That was my best Timmy Wood.

BN: You guys are both being ridiculous. Of course ghosts are real, and of course they wear clothes. Haven’t you seen Ghost Dad? And Timmy, to answer your question about my influences, I’d say mostly Bill Cosby movies from the late 80s and early 90s: Leonard Part 6, Meteor Man, Ghost Dad, you know, the classics.

PSJ: Niceties! Please and thank you’s, it’s the interviewers way. I enjoy the classics as well, Marty. Try this one on for size: I’m a young man about the town, I have a girlfriend and a three piece suit, I might or might not have eaten a Nutragrain bar. It’s August 20th. Now, I can go see Inception again OR I can go see Darewolves. Tell me why I should choose Darewolves.

TW: In our show, Joseph Gordon Levitt is performing live with us. Not just a projection on a screen. And I must say he is just riveting!

BN: Oh, Timmy, now’s probably a good time to tell you Joey Levitt canceled on us. He called me last night. Something about never having to work ever, ever again. Sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. Now I’m embarrassed.

PSJ: So no JGL, aka Cobra Commander. This is a huge blow to your show. Do you have a replacement or a backup plan?

TW: Well we may not have JGL! But we do have some other funny folks that you may have heard of funnyman Matt Lusk…

PSJ: Is he the Asian guy from The Hangover?

BN: Funnyman Kelly Harkins…

PSJ: Of Three Ninja’s Kick Back fame!?

TW: Bootown creator and funny lady Julie Gomez…

PSJ: I loved him in the movie version of Doubt.

BN: Funnyman and amateur wrestler Will Fordyce…

PSJ: He sounds French.

TW: Two words a letter and an apostrophe: Claire O’Malley.

PSJ: O’Really?

BN: And I think that about does it…

PSJ: This list is like a Who’s Who of rejected names for Jim Henson’s Muppets…where’s the beef?

TW: Oh and of course Brian Nichols who co wrote the hit play Ante, Christ and is now performing in ComedySportz LA!

BN: Oh! I almost forgot, Jared “The Beef” Doreck and Roland “The Bun” Ruiz who will unfortunately no longer be performing in the show. Something about an offer they got to work with Joseph Gordon Levitt but they did help us develop some material.

PSJ: It sounds like you’re trying to bake a cake with no flour if you catch my drift. Don’t you have a catalyst…you know another crucial member of the team?

BN: Yes, and the man to my left, Mister Timothy J Wood. Founding member of Reginald Funk, Scatter!, and TWood’s Feel Good Jug Band.

PSJ: I think you’re missing your most attractive, I might even go so far as saying sexiest member…

BN: You are referring, of course, to the 10th member of The Darewolves team, Sweet Lady Comedy.

PSJ: AH! Yes…Sweet Lady Comedy how we all love her. How could we ever forget her? Guys the joke is no longer funny. Look, um, well (laughter) this is awkward now. I don’t quite no how to say this…but…I, I was under the impression that I…well…

BN: What is it Paul? You can tell us anything. Right Tim?

TW: (nods)

PSJ: I really didn’t want to do this during the interview but…am I still in, or did Cobra C really take my place?

TW: In our hearts?

BN: No, no, Jo Go canceled, remember? He’s dead to us.

PSJ: Well, that’s not exactly what I meant. I’m not getting any younger, let me be blunt. Is there room for one more in The Darewolves?

TW: I shouldn’t do this without consulting Brian in private first but…ah well what the hell. Paul, how would you like to join The Darewolves…

PSJ: Yes! Thank God! I’ve been trying to get in forever. I have a great character called McCloster, he’s…oh just watch, “Heeeeeey, I’ma McClosterrr! I like to eat looooobster!”

BN: (To Timmy) You should have consulted me.

TW: Wait! Paul, I was going to see if you’d like to join The Darewolves as President of The Darewolves fan club.

PSJ: This interview is over. Get out. Ok come back. Sit down. I hate you both. Here’s a new hard hitting question. List of people that are jerks: Hitler, Clay Aiken and you guys. How could you pass on McCloster? (Paul begins to weep.)

TW: Paul Paul Paul, that character sounds wonderful and you’re in.

BN: You’ve always been in. We just wanted to see you cry.

PSJ: (Drying his tears.) Really?

TW: Yes, really. I wrote a character for you too called Jorge the Sad Boy. It’s this guy named Jorge. And he is sad.

BN: Timmy, I can’t believe you are taking credit for Jorge. I developed that character!

TW: Well this sounds like something we should all take up with Sweet Lady Comedy and see what she thinks.

BN: Or we could just settle this on Friday, August 20th at the Midtown Art Center at 7pm and 10pm.

PSJ: Why that date?

BN: Because that is the fucking date of the show! Good lord!!! Are you deaf?!

PSJ: Watch your language, this is a children’s blog.

BN: I apologize. I lost my temper. I’m not proud of that. I think we can all learn a lesson from this, boys and girls.

PSJ: (To Timmy) What is Marty saying?

BN: MY NAME ISN’T FUCKING MARTY! IT’S BRIAN FUCKING NICHOLS!!! ARE YOU FUCKING RETARDED?!!

PSJ: Oh Mylanta.

BN: I WILL RIP YOUR ARMS OFF, SALAZAR! CLEAN OFF!

PSJ: Wow. The censors won’t like any of that.

BN: Oh boy. There I go again. Sorry about that. Can I get a swig of that Shamrock Shake now?

PSJ: If you can get it away from Timmy…Timmy? I think he’s sleeping. (Brian checks his pulse and just shakes his head “No”.) Sweet butterscotch, not Timmy…Shamrock shakes ain’t no joke.

BN: Shit. I’d better get Levitt on the phone.

TW: Sorry I was listening to my Dean Koontz tape again. Damn this is good! Katy Perry does all the characters voices too!

BN: (On phone) Oh, hey Joe, uh…never mind. Bye.

PSJ: Well, thank you guys for sitting down with me and answering all of my hard hitting awesome questions–

BN: That was a horrible interview. You didn’t ask us one good question.

PSJ: To be honest I thought you guys were interviewing me. I had to make up everything on the spot.

BN: Couldn’t even tell.

TW: Alright guys, here’s a question for y’all: Three guests check into a hotel room. The clerk says the bill is $30, so each guest pays $10. Later the clerk realizes the bill should only be $25. To rectify this, he gives the bellhop $5 to return to the guests. On the way to the room, the bellhop realizes that he cannot divide the money equally. As the guests didn’t know the total of the revised bill, the bellhop decides to just give each guest $1 and keep $2 for himself.

Now that each of the guests has been given $1 back, each has paid $9, bringing the total paid to $27. The bellhop has $2. If the guests originally handed over $30, what happened to the remaining dollar? (Long pause.)

PSJ: (Pulling out a dollar bill.) Is this the dollar that was missing?!

TW: GASP!

BN: Spirit Traveler!!

The Darewolves will be performing live August 20th at Midtown Arts Center 7pm and 10pm. $10 and a smile is all you need.

August 20th. Midtown Arts Center. 7pm and 10pm. You better check that farmers almanac and hope there isn’t a full moon. Darewolves.

Yo peeps! I’m going to be at the Bayou City Arts Festival this weekend. Classical Theatre Company is presenting some Commedia dell’Arte and I’m overjoyed to be part of these scenes. Come out and check out some art, and swing by at 2pm to see myself, Phil Hays, Jessica Boone-Hedrick, Jared Doreck and Roland Ruiz show off our commedia chops. It should be fun!

Is the horse upside down or the words? It's your call...

El Duende, based on Columbian folklore is BooTown’s Halloween show this year. For the past two years BooTown has done spooky themed shows Fitcher’s A Bastard (But His Birds Alright) in 2007 and Spaghetti Head last year.

El Duende is about a young married couple, myself and Colleen Moore, going to the country for a funeral. The husband is introduced to the strange family, played by Hoja Lopez, Jared Doreck, Blair Knowles, and David Glenn Spencer,  and traditions that his wife wishes she left behind. We soon learn that there is more than just embarrassing family members that makes the wife not want to return to the country…(scary music here).

This show is improvisational, based off an outline written by BooTown and carefully overseen by director Emily Hynds. I have had a blast working on this show and think that it will be fun to watch. It is outdoors in a back yard so bring a jacket!